Be There

I've spent the past week the same way as most of the country.

Evaluating the past year, grading myself, and planning for my future.

Each year I try to come up with a word that will help me focus on what I want to accomplish in the next year.

In 2010 my word was Prioritize.

I'd spent 2009 rushing from thing to thing, trying to make 30 hours of stuff fit in the 24 I was given.

I knew that I needed a change, so I woke up each morning in 2010 and told myself to Prioritize.  There were days that I failed to keep the main thing the main thing, but for the most part my daily mantra worked.

So I decided to make it a yearly thing.

2011 was Illuminate.

I wanted to lighten up and have more fun.  I wanted to shine God's light brighter and lead the way through the darkness.  I struggled all year with the whole lighten up thing, but think I made some good progress by the end of the year.  

The latter part of 2011 has been trying for me.

The Unexpected was hitting me from all sides and for an avid planner such as myself, the Unexpected is scary.

Like, really scary.

I like to live my life a few days ahead of Now.

I prepare, plan, organize.

Which can be a good thing.

But it can also mean I completely miss out on Today.

I convince myself if I can check off my to do list today, then tomorrow there will be time to play, to laugh, to enjoy.

My brother's recent scare has snapped something inside of me that desperately needed to be snapped.

With one phone call I suddenly realized that Tomorrow didn't matter nearly as much as Today.

So 2012's word was easy and desperately needed.


This year I will attend each and every day, hour, minute, second I am given.

Whoever I'm with will get my attention.

Whatever I'm doing will be done intentionally.

I am going to be present when Josie wants to play.

I'll show up when Gabe needs to be held.  For an hour.  When the laundry is piled high.

I'm going to learn to make eye contact if it kills me.

This year I am going to teach myself that time keeps on rolling and if I don't want it to pass me by, I need to attend.

I'm excited to embrace this new lifestyle.

It's a big change for me.

I'm excited to travel and explore and learn new things without having to have every detail lined up.

Yes, 2012 is going to be a great year to be present for.


Marci said...

I love this post. Simple, but awesome. Need to document a day in pictures as well. Thanks for the inspiration!

Amy said...

Thanks for stopping by my blog earlier. I replied to your question just a minute ago. Your blog design and your family are beautiful! I love this post and how you are purposeful and organized in your thoughts. I'm like that way deep down, but often get sidetracked by the mundane of everyday life. Thanks for the motivation!