Not Me Monday!!

Woo Hoo!!!
It feels good to be back.
If I wasn't so, you know, awesome and on top of things, I probably would apoligize for being so unawesome and not on top of things.

Three months is way to long to keep all the things that I most definatly did not do all to myself.

So here I go, confession time.

Did you hear about that woman who wanted to finish her blog post so bad that she handed her two year old an old keyboard and taught her how to "email" on her own?
Two years old is way too young for a blogger account addiction. (right?!?!)

This organic eating, no plastic bag, recycling momma surely hasn't been serving frozen meals or processed lunch meats this week. No way!

And if you opened her bottom drawer next to the pantry, you would find only reusable grocery bags, not 200 plastic Publix bags!

I always wash Andrew's uniforms, so my husband did not have to "rewear" a pair of work pants that smelled like onions and bacon and probably had some nasty other food particles attached to them.
Nope, his uniforms are washed, fluffed, and ironed daily.

I did not proclaim to Josie that she had the stinkiest morning breath EVER only to realize that I was breathing my unbrushed coffee breath all over her!
A mom that did that would be so hypocritical!

And I most certainly did not chose to keep crafting with Amy while Josie yelled out protests to her naptime. If I had, I'm sure I would have gone to check on her and when I walked in, she would not have removed her dress.
That wasn't me, so I know that it wasn't me who then later, sent Amy to check on her, only to receive the message that not only was she still awake, but she was, as we say, "Nakie!"

I have never been one to check my daughter "stinky diapers" to survey it's contents. So if you saw a frantic look on my face as I changed Josie's diaper the other morning, it wasn't because I was convinced there was a worm in her poo.

The "worm" would not have turned out, upon closer investigation, to have simply been the undigested outside of a pickle slice.

What am I doing talking about all this nonsense that didn't even happen?
I have bags to pack and a four hour drive to the beach to prep for!
Oh, the "Not Me's" I'll rack up on that drive!


Amber said...

Getting David over a weeks worth of uniforms was one of my best investments ever. You can get him black pants from the thrift store for like $3-$4. I do that because they just ruin them anyways.

Kameron said...

I have not forgotten my reusable bags for the last 3 trips to the market...before today!! I was so proud that I remembered to put them back in my car, finally!